Things are going well on many fronts in my life at the moment. The babies are good. I've settled down into my stay at home mom routine. Finances are ticking along. Pretty much everything is as it should be with one glaring exception.
My relationship with my husband is completely falling apart. And I don't know how to stop the bleeding at this point. I can't tell you what is wrong. Neither of us can put our finger on one event or one moment or one conversation that is the root of the issue. It's just very frustrating. I would go into more details, but it would only be from my perspective which obviously one sided. But, if we happen to cross your mind, please say a prayer for us. I am not going anywhere. This is where I belong. I'm supposed to be married to this man and I'm supposed to be mother to these two boys and this is my life and I love it. I'm in the long run on this and I'm sure we will get something figured out.
In the meantime, I'm doing what I can to make things right again. The third baby issue was settled months ago from my perspective, but it keeps upsetting my husband. So, I spent all day yesterday cleaning out the storage room under the stairs and made a heap of baby furniture, Boppys, Bumbos, baby swings, changing tables, and the baby girl decor we had been given before we knew Elliott was a boy. I asked him to put everything on Craigslist for me. The only thing I haven't been able to part with yet is a fleece sleepbag covered in pink elephants. I'm sure I'll be able to let that go too before too long. And I only teared up for a few seconds. If this is what it will take to show him that the baby issue is settled, I'm okay with letting go of these material things.
We'll see what happens from here.
Keep on doing the things you do for your husband and family. Keep on loving even when it doesn't feel like love. Marriage is not always like a fairytale. It is often work and patience. Men go through odd things - usually work related. They may not even know that they are stressed, but they are and it spills over onto the family. But things pass; they do get better. We do need to have lunch.
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